Almost Summer

I have 2 more days in Lone Peak High School, about 6 more hours! I have hated it there so much, I can't wait to get back to MY school. 5 days until I'm back in Arizona which is really raising my spirits. Hopefully things will get back to normal soon! I am so excited to see all my old friends and some new ones :D

I spent probably an hour last night just watching it rain. I don't know what it is about it but it really calms me down when I'm having anxiety problems. Then I talked to Rebecca (my best friend) for a long while. I really miss her and can't wait to spend some time with her in Florida! I fell asleep at midnight but I still wake up at 8 no matter what! I have been staying up until 3 lately and its not doing much to me in the mornings surprisingly, however it can't be to good for me. Maybe I need some insomnia meds... 

Cass and I have not been talking at all and it makes me worried. But I'm not relying on him like I used to which is good. He doesn't seem to love me like he claims anymore. At least I have options now. (I'll see how good they are once I'm back.) I like boys to much for my own good!

Anyhow, life is going great and I couldn't be happier right now! 

"Here is the deepest secret nobody knows..."

I wish I could tell you how I feel, but I don't even know how real it is yet. I need to be in Arizona and straighten out my life so much. You are like the sunshine that is slowly bringing me out of the dark. Maybe you're reading this right now and wondering if I could possibly be talking about you and doubting it, don't. It is a mad world after all. 

..."here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart) "

 <3عشق

Havn't Posted in a While...

So many things have happened! I'll just make a list since its what I'm best at

• Passed out down the stairs(guess I wasn't just paranoid in my last post!)
• Got great grades for once
• Found out my bf isn't all he once seemed to be
• Met some great people, some a little to late since I'm outta Utah in a week
• Found myself again
• Got into religion and decided I'm not what I have always claimed to be
• Became more optimistic about life
• Got a state ID, just what I've always wanted
• Did NOT stop my sarcasm
• Changed my plans for the future drastically
• Acquired a lot of secrets